MARLER: Nussmeier panic shows CFB rumor mill is out of control

Maria Lysaker-Imagn Images

By Chris Marler

The Telephone game and TMZ.

That was the weird combination that took place yesterday on social media, as rumors swirled that Garrett Nussmeier suffered a horrific, season altering injury on Wednesday.

We heard every possible nightmare scenario. He tore his ACL, he tore his PCL, he broke, sprained, or strained every possible acronym in his leg.

College football has a ton of issues. It has a ton of idiotic moments. Realignment, the transfer portal, and NIL have become bemoaned by nearly every fan coast to coast. However, one thing that remains true is that the fans of this sport continue to be the most deranged and unhinged part of it.

It’s endearing, mostly.

Fans painting their faces and devoting roughly 98 percent of their discretionary income to the 12-14 Saturdays that ultimately decided their emotional stability and happiness? We love that. Pretending you’re an insider on X (formerly Twitter) and making up fake stories for clout? Gross. Like, super gross.

Yes, NIL sucks. But faceless accounts on social media desperate for attention and a $32 monthly payout from Elon Musk? Yikes.

Welcome to 2025, where credibility and candor in college football feel as outdated as Pac-12 After Dark. The worst part? The chaos isn’t slowing down anytime soon.

So, Garrett Nussmeier, and gullible fans everywhere become collateral damage for the aforementioned clout.

Roughly 3.8 miles from LSU’s practice facilities, in an office in Baton Rouge, not a word of it had been heard. And for a job built around staying plugged into social media, that silence spoke volumes. In other words, no one closer to the situation had caught wind of anything. But that didn’t stop the internet from spiraling into full-blown panic mode, over what ultimately turned out to be, wait for it…nothing.

There may not be a real solution, at least not one that fixes the root issue: people on social media being terrible. And if there’s one constant in college football, it’s that neither my aunt Diane on Facebook nor most self-proclaimed insiders on Twitter are going to change that anytime soon.