Marler Monday: Blood, sweat, and tears

By Chris Marler

It’s game week, and by Saturday (Friday for a few), the collective college football world will drop to their knees like Andy Dufresne in Shawshank Redemption rejoicing that our beloved sport is back. 

I’ve never bought into the idea that Week 0 games don’t count. After five long days of work, if the bar’s out of Maker’s Mark but still has Evan Williams, I’m not walking away. Same logic here, I’m not ignoring Big 12 games in Ireland or a late-night thriller between Hawaii and Stanford.

But, Week 1? That’s the good stuff. That’s the top shelf, two-for-one special, drink or drown type of vibes. What can we expect for this week?

Blood. Sweat. Tears. 

Blood

That Saturday night game in Temu Death Valley is going to be an absolute war. I’ve thought about this game all offseason and envisioned a 35-31 type instant classic with offensive firepower for sixty minutes. Both teams have that capability. However, it wasn’t until I talked to my esteemed coworker Hunt Palmer that I began looking at this game through a different lens. 

There are three things I hate in this world: terrorism, people that pronounce the “L” in salmon, and cliches. That third one aside, this game will be won or lost in the trenches. To take it a step further, defense also wins championships. I think both of these teams will have some of the best defenses in the country when the season is over. LSU looks improved on that side of the ball this fall camp, and Clemson is, well, Clemson. Both teams have NFL talent everywhere on defense. 

Points matter, but LSU’s path to victory runs through the trenches, where games are won, seasons are defined, and battles get bloody.

Sweat

Kentucky and Auburn fans have to be sweating right now, and not just because it’s one million degrees in August. Auburn fans are going into year three of the Hugh Freeze error. I mean era. They open with a road game at Baylor and need a win more than they need to pick one singular mascot, but I digress. 

For what it’s worth I really like this Auburn team, and them beating Baylor is my lock of the week. Absolute MC Hammer the money line if you’re into that sort of thing.

That doesn’t mean they won’t sweat a little bit before the clock hits zero. There are a lot of questions on the roster because of all the new faces they are bringing in from the portal and two back-to-back top ten recruiting classes.

Then there’s Kentucky. Kentucky is the worst team in the conference, in my opinion. They’re coming off a four win season where they went 1-7 in conference play and finished the season losing six of their last seven games. Toledo is coming off an eight-win season, including a 41–17 road win over an SEC team last year. They also earned 13 preseason AP votes, which was more than Auburn.

The line on this game opened at Kentucky -12.5 and has dropped all the way to -7.5. 

Tears 

Sports, man. 

Most of you already know where I’m going with this, and I’d venture to say that a lot of our readers feel the same way I do. I’ll be a mess Saturday morning watching Lee Corso say goodbye in his final College Gameday appearance.

This sport has been my absolute favorite since I was four-years-old. I grew up watching Corso put on mascot heads and jab a No. 2 pencil at his cohosts with a sharp “not so fast, my friend,” suddenly making me care about a Pac-12 game I’d never thought twice about.

Lee Corso isn’t just an icon, he’s an institution. A familiar face in a sport that has transformed so drastically it’s nearly unrecognizable from three decades ago. But, not Corso. He’s stayed the same. 

Sure, he’s aged. His speech has become impaired. His mind doesn’t seem to be as quick as it once was. But, his commitment to doing what he loves has been unwavering. On Saturday, we will all wake up, turn on College Gameday, and watch a staple of our youth, topic of our conversation, and icon of our sport put on a mascot head for the very last time.

I will be in tears. And, I will not feel a bit ashamed or embarrassed by it. Neither will you.