By Chris Marler
We are fresh off our first actual SEC elimination game for the college football playoff. But, other than that it was a pretty uneventful weekend in the SEC.
I’m kidding. It was very dramatic. Every week has been dramatic. This entire season has felt like a Real Housewives of Hoover targeted at Southern Baptists and grown men who bark at people.
Here are the Week 12 SEC Power Rankings.
1. Ole Miss (Last Week – 5)
To be the man, you gotta beat the man. Right? Ole Miss didn’t just beat last week’s No. 1 Georgia this Saturday, they dismantled them. Georgia scored one touchdown against Ole Miss, and it was after an interception they ran back to the Ole Miss 21 yard-line. After that, the Bulldogs scored three points in the last 55 minutes and got manhandled in the trenches all day long.
Ole Miss is still a flawed team, and we need more consistency in big moments from Lane Kiffin, but Saturday felt like a corner was being turned as a program. The Rebels are now just two wins away from the College Football Playoff.
2. Texas (Last Week – 2)
My favorite game to play each week while watching Texas is trying to see if Quinn Ewers is actually good. No matter what side I land on, I talk myself into it adamantly for the next three hours. Ewers was phenomenal Saturday, and the Texas defense is somehow still not getting enough love from national pundits and media. They will soon enough.
3. Tennessee (Last Week – 3)
Tennessee still hasn’t allowed an opponent to score over 20 points this season, and don’t look now but Nico Iamaleava connected on a few deep balls against Mississippi State. Meanwhile, Dylan Sampson continues to put up video game numbers, but no one is noticing because he doesn’t play on a blue field in the PNW.
4. Alabama (Last Week – 4)
Last week I was criticized by LSU fans for having Alabama not only ahead of them, but multiple spots ahead of them. Listen, if I were petty I would bring up those receipts and talk my trash. And, I am a petty, so allow me to do that now.
Nick Saban is gone. There’s no Heisman trophy winners on Bama’s sideline. And they got beat by Vanderbilt just over a calendar month ago.
And, they still beat LSU like a damn drum.
5. Georgia (Last Week – 1)
This Georgia team is giving off major 2017 Clemson vibes. They have a lot of talent and should win almost every game. But they have an absolute liability at quarterback right now, and much like Carson Beck’s hairline, they seem to be regressing.
6. South Carolina (Last Week – 6)
A lot of teams in this league are very lucky that they either dodged South Carolina this year on the schedule or got them early in the season because this team is playing like one of the best teams in the country right now.
7. Texas A&M (Last Week – 9)
The last few weeks will be very interesting for this Texas A&M team. They’ve lost their star running back and Mike Elko hasn’t fully committed to Marcel Reed as QB1. The South Carolina game was very disappointing, but that all goes away if they can get a win in College Station Thanksgiving weekend.
8. LSU (Last Week – 7)
Garrett Nussmeier and Carson Beck are in one of the most heated season-long competitions for who can make worse decisions on national television. I genuinely thought that back-to-back against Ole Miss and Arkanasas was going to be a catalyst for this team. I thought wrong. They’re still very talented, and watching the amount of elite recruits walk the sideline Saturday night, you better get LSU now while you can.
8. Vanderbilt (Last Week – 6)
If we are being honest with each other, the moment I saw a news notification pop up about Diego Pavia suing the NCAA less than 24 hours before their game against South Carolina, it kind of felt like the writing was on the wall. South Carolina finally figured out how to beat Vanderbilt soundly, but there’s still a lot of season left for this team and plenty of time for some more wins because the clock isn’t going to strike midnight until at least after bowl season.
10. Missouri (Last Week – 13)
Missouri won the drunkest game of the year on Saturday against Oklahoma. The dramatic ending that featured four touchdowns in the last three minutes with two fumble returns for scores. However, nothing was as entertaining as hearing Eli Drinkwitz say in his postgame interview that it was a big win to keep Missouri’s playoff hopes alive. In other news, I woke up today, which is huge because it kept my hopes of dating Sydney Sweeney alive.
The Bottom Six
If you’re reading this, you, yes you could one hundred percent compete for the starting quarterback job at no less than four of these schools. Chase your dreams.
11. Arkansas
12. Auburn
13. Mississippi State
14. Florida
15. Kentucky
16. Oklahoma
